Killer Critics

Killer Critics

Most of us have mean inner critics that when we dig deep enough, have benevolent functions, good intentions, that kind of thing (check out this article on protective functions of inner critics for more on this). But some people have critics that go beyond mean, and...
Defining Confidence

Defining Confidence

How do you define self confidence? Is it a feeling you have sometimes (or wish you had)? How do you know when you are confident and when you aren’t? Defining self confidence is a complex thing, because well, confidence is a complex thing. We tend to simplify it into...
Guilt versus Shame

Guilt versus Shame

I learnt a very personal and tragic lesson about guilt and shame over Christmas. I notice it with many of my clients, and in myself sometimes; it’s the tendency to turn guilt into shame. It often happens so quickly we don’t even notice it, and we don’t notice the...
The Dangers of Inspirational Quotes

The Dangers of Inspirational Quotes

Until recently, I thought I was a bit odd for finding ‘Inspirational Quotes’ so irritating. After accepting a little oddness in myself, I starting thinking about why they’re so irritating…and now I find them irritating AND heartbreaking,...